Money is too little but its power is big

Paving

Right from the day when I came out from the camp,the word freedom was what fully occupied my mind.But now,I thought,I still didn't own what should I have.

Honestly,I told myself that I should get back to the camp,to brainwash me once again,to train me,discipline me again.Because,the recent Chin Hoong Liang is not longer the one who are so optimistic,so strong in the way of catching his dream.He is totally lost now,losing his way to the path of success.He has no ideas,of why he become like this or maybe,too much of relaxations cause him to forget everything,including his dream.I need the silver lining,I need the light of success,to lead me back to the track.Please,I need your hand,guide me.I don't want to become like this anymore,I realized this.So,God,lead me.

Sweet

Today,when I asked myself,who is the one that really mean the whole world to me except my family,without the second thought,your name flashed into my mind Khloe,your name,the special one.

I never know that you really played an irreplaceable role in my life.I never know that without you,my heart will be so empty and I never know that if i have lost you,i can't survive.

One night,when I was about to fall asleep after having a call with you,my mind suddenly started to imagine what would be if you decided to walk away from my life.I thought a lot,but still,I can't accept it.So,I changed my mind and started to think what if our relationship last forever.How sweet it would be if I could hold your hands moseyed down the white powdery beach.How sweet it would be if I could walk down the aisle with you,helping you to wear how own wedding ring,as you wish,as big as my head and how sweet it would be if I could see you every time when I opened up my eyes.You are awesome,an angel-like princess that God created just to suit me.

You will never know how much you mean to me.Sometime,I really wish that you can have my eyes,because when I see your face,my mouth starts watering.You're too special in my eyes,only in my eyes.Do you ever know that,only you are able to tempt my heart.Even though there are thousands or pretty girls outside there,but I will still look for you because you are just like my magnet,you attract me automatically.Yes,indeed,there are lots of girls who are more prettier than you,but so what?They don't even attract me,only you,your soul that makes me faint.I love you baby.I love you.

A new chapter of life

Well,how you guys feeling actually?It has been a long time since I posted something on this wall.Honestly,through these clouds and rainbows,I have learnt a lot,not about the other people like my family or friends,but about me,myself.

It all started when I was entering the camp of the National Service.What I can say about the experience of mine in these whole three months is,it's unexplainable yet leaving an indelible mark in my heart.To be honest,for those who want to escape from this so called "suffering and wasting time" programme,here is the advice,think twice or even you have think the second time and still don't want to join,I tell you,you will be missing out something that will change your life thoroughly,something that will have some "plastic surgery" of your mind.How do I know?Because I experienced that.

Indeed,the camp is an uphill task for most of the strawberry kids aka generation Y.I admit that in the first 3 weeks,I felt like the camp is really wasting my time,nothing special and nothing fun.I whined,I cried or even yelled at my dorm.I was helpless,hopeless and it was that significant moment for me to realize something.I was homesick,I was not the one that I thought I could be.Totally different from what I had imagined of.

Seriously,NS really coached us,not coached but taught us more about ourselves,more likely about the importance of being independent and so on.Before stepping into this camp,I thought that I was able to cope with loneliness,or was able to be independent,without the hands of the other people I could survive.But I was wrong,totally wrong.I couldn't and I don't even know why.Because of this,the plan of my further studies changed.Of course,study abroad is certainly better than anything here,but I still couldn't leave my little nasty house and still wanted to pester around with my family.I trashed the plan into the recycle bin in my mind and started to weep again because,I have no plan anymore!!!i have to start the very first step again and find my way back to the track.It really did blow out my mind.But luckily,it happened because,it makes me have a different of perspective and view of my life.

Right then,I started to think more widely.Before this,I chose to take Foundation programme because it is people say "quite safe" and also a fast unobstructive track to touchon the course I want.But the only problem is,if I have already taken the programme from the university,I couldn't transfer to the other university which is more ideal to me.That's why I said,luckily I didn't follow the path that I have created last time.Then,the thought of taking A-level swirled in my mind.A-level,Hmmmm..sounds pretty hard yeah it is literally really hard.But at the same time,if I could get a impeccably results,my dream would be materialized.So,I opted to choose this tough path because I know,to reach my goal,it won't be easy,and even it has hundreds of reasons to stop me from moving toward my dream,I would still look for the only reason that motivate me to realize my target.So at last,I chose to take A-level in local first before study in my dream university.But it is no longer a dream.I know,if I really strive for it,dream is not a miracle but it will turn into reality.

7/7/14,I'm waiting for you

I'm so honest to you,I never chat with other girls,flirt with other girls,so,can you just do the same for me?

When will all this gonna stop?

Does this all worth baby?Does it worth it?Does it worth it to keep this as a secret?To be honest,it scattered me into a thousand pieces.I know,you told me that it would help us to protect our relationship.But,at the same time,it makes me feel like i'm nothing to you,i'm not your boyfriend.Every single actions i have to be well aware before doing them,to make sure that it would not affect you and your hobbies.But,this really hurts me alot,like how you feel when your fingers getting cut by a knife.I can't explain it with words as i feel like those feelings couldn't be more terrify.Every night before sleep,I will recall back all those sweet moments,with you so that those bad memories wouldn't raise again.I know,yes,I truly know you had sacrificed so much for me during the period of my studies.But,let's look at my side,I can't simply ask you to date with me as you told me that you scare there is spy observing us,fine,I can understand that.You told me that we can't go out to play sports games like jogging or basketball,worrying that your mom will know us.Okay,I accept that.You are not allowing me to go and see you play your basketball matches as you scare that your teammates will know us.My tears dropped as I listened to this.But fine,okay,time will heals me later.But,even comment your photo also can't.My heart broke like how the plate smash on the floor.How desperate i want to say you're beautiful,or a single word like"pretty" also can't.And every time,when I want to check your messages,I will stop myself,as I don't want to know the truth,If if i can,i would like to ask them to come out and talk to me,but I can't,all is just to protect you,I want to keep us,even if u have betrayed me.I love you,but when will this gonna stop?I saw my friends posting their couple photos,and this further breaks my heart.I want to hold your hand,but I can't,I want to hug you in the public,but i can't ,i want to kiss you in the dark,but i can't,and I want to call you baby,but I can't.Baby,can you make me feel more safer?Don't breaks my heart anymore and I'm waiting that day,the day that I can tell and warn every boys from chasing you,check your phone,hold your hands,hug you,kiss you and comment on your photos.But,that day is too far for me.Please,make me feel that i'm special.But,lastly,can I ask you a question?To you,who am I?

Tensions

Withstand the tensions,don't give up,smell the roses,good

Never change

I really need you,but I gradually lose my trust on you.Seems like you are trying to avoid me,so I better keep quiet and do whatever you need.I love you,never change,never last and never miss my faith on you.But maybe you are too young to bear in such circumstance.I understand,I will do whatever you want,and make you happy and smile,like the way I did before.

Examination

Good day people,having to say that recently I'm really stressed out with  the examination.Well it's good to see that most of the papers that I had passed through are not too hard,at least the situations are still under controlled.Felt truly ecstatic!But it's still have yet to finish.I still have to sit for it like about 9 or 10 days.Quite tough and memorizing things is the hardest part for me.Why we have to remember those formulas?Gosh,chills are creeping on my spine.Time's up.Good luck guys and pray for me.Number 1,i will STRIKE FOR YOU.


Saying of the day:Nothing is impossible,even the word itself says it's possible.

SPM

Well recently I just got that one of my friends just achieved an astonishing result of SPM that sparkled the whole image of my school.She was just climbed onto the top 3 cleverest candidate among the Sabahans.As anticipation goes,she got a straight 10 A plus and an A in her English subject,but it's pretty enough for her to show how good she is in her academic section.I can see a shimmering light and future on her.Congratulation my friend,and I will try my best to get over from you.See you soon,Work hard,get wonderful result in SPM,that's my mission now.I believe in Pygmalion effect.So,Chin Hoong Liang,I know and believe that you can get such a great result in your SPM.Good luck